1. The difference between healthy and unhealthy control.
2. Why we find it so hard to accept the things we don't like and each other's differences.
3. Acceptance is more important than you 'understanding'.
What We Covered This Week:
In this Round Up I discuss: What are ‘control issues’?
Control can be healthy or unhealthy. Healthy control is taking responsibility for ourselves, emotionally regulating and being in control of how we’re speaking and behaving. Unhealthy control is about a lack of acceptance and the need for other people to change their behaviour so WE feel better.
We can attempt to control others by being forceful, offering unsolicited advice and/or clearly showing our disapproval. This is unhealthy and also unfair to those around us.⠀
We need to work on accepting our lack of control. We can’t control the world, the traffic, the weather or other people. Nor should we try.
Who are we to say how others should behave? And if we love people, I encourage you to let them be who they are.
The only person we can change is ourselves. If we have uncomfortable feelings about people, places or things, those are our emotions for which we are accountable. We can strive to take responsibility for ourselves, our attitudes, our beliefs and our insecurities. This is what will bring us true peace.
A key question to ask ourselves when wrestling with something is: What am I not accepting right now?
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