Reparenting is a form of therapy that develops our ability to parent ourselves and meet our needs both past and present.

Many of us have a Critical Inner Parent, that keeps us feeling anxious and inadequate. Reparenting helps us create a Nurturing Inner Parent.

Sometimes we want our partners to ‘look after us’, to parent us. Only *we* truly have the ability to look after ourselves and see to the young parts of us when necessary. Our partners can be part of it, but not all of it.


1. Discipline

Not punitive or oppressive! This discipline is about writing your own Life Rulebook. Being the guide we probably always wanted, who is able to encourage us to get things done, figure out what to do and offer containment.

2. Self-Care

Nurturing parent steps in and knows how to look after us. Eating well, exercising, having boundaries, being kind to ourselves... all of these are offering us the most loving parenting. From this place we can be self-reliant and heal from insecure attachments (where we want to be rescued by others). We fundamentally take responsibility for ourselves.

3. Joy

We can grow up so quickly. Reclaiming and creating joy in our adult lives is about making time for the sheer joy of things. This increases our self-worth, our ability to be happy and how we can be more relaxed, kind and accepting human beings.

4. Emotional Regulation

Such a big part of parenting is soothing. Life is challenging, it can be jarring and difficult a lot of the time. To withstand this without becoming negative, bitter and hardened people, we need to be hugely supportive and calming parents to ourselves.

The irony is that as we parent ourselves and see to our younger selves, the more adult we are able to be. We develop the skills we need to navigate life and give ourselves the encouragement and care we need to live and love wholeheartedly.

How To Reparent Yourself - Part I

find additional teachings and bonus work that relate to this video below


submit a topic
More videos

do your Relationship history

Click here to download my Relationship History PDF that I created specifically for you to discover your patterns so you can know what to be working on.

learn How To Break your Patterns

Once you know what your patterns are, click here for a step-by-step guide about how to recognise these patterns, the behaviour that is sabotaging you and keeping you stuck, and what to do about it.

How to be more secure in relationships

Once you can recognise your patterns, click here for tools and strategies to help you react in healthier ways when you get triggered by your partner.

Additional Teachings And Bonus Work

“I recognise so much of myself in what you talk about. It’s truly revelatory to try and approach these issues from a 'gentleness' perspective.”

more comments

so they say:


People in our online community helping each other


Comments and words of encouragement shared together


Articles and posts to read and engage with


Minutes of videos and recordings to listen to or watch

Relationship History Workbook Download

Learn how to break your relationship patterns with my Relationship History Workbook. It's the exact same Relationship History I do with my clients in my private practice. Plus it's free :)

get your copy