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The preconceived idea of boundaries being forceful or aggressive are inaccurate. Boundaries are literally about self-care. I encourage us to always review our situations and ask ourselves: What is best for me now? For my family? For my relationship? For my career?
If we’re feeling burnt out, irritated, depressed, are playing the victim, or are in and out of survival mode, these are signs we would do well to pause and see what needs to be adjusted in our lives.
The urge is to blame other people, but we can’t control other people. We are not powerless in our lives. We have a lot of power and we need to start utilising it.
I go over my introductory seven steps to the art of boundary setting:⠀
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Step 1 – Assess The Person or Situation: What’s on offer here and how can I look after myself? ⠀
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Step 2 – Notice Your Emotions – They Are Your Ultimate Guide⠀
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Step 3 – Calmly Express What You Need: We are not Superhuman and that’s okay.
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Step 4 – Realise Our Thoughts & Emotions Are Our Responsibility: Emotional boundaries help us stay in control of our emotions and thoughts.⠀
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Step 5 - Recognise In Our Personal Relationship We Let The Basics Slide: It’s often in our most intimate relationships we can be the most boundaryless. Be accountable.⠀
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Step 6 - Live Your Life In A Boundaried Way: Living a boundaried life is a mind-set. ⠀
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Step 7 – Boundaries For Co-Dependents: It’s all too easy for us to focus on the people around us and how they are ‘causing’ the ‘problems’.⠀
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When we focus on these 7 steps our confidence will start to increase. We will feel free. People will comment about how relaxed we look. We will be calmer. We will like ourselves. That’s worth A LOT.
In this video I speak about the most important tools we need to feel secure in relationships, have confidence, and feel in charge of ourselves as we go about life - boundaries.
Boundaries remind us of our power and also our responsibility to ourselves in life.
FIND ADDITIONAL TEACHINGS AND BONUS WORK THAT RELATE TO THIS VIDEO BELOW
Click here to download my Relationship History PDF that I created specifically for you to discover your patterns so you can know what to be working on.
Once you know what your patterns are, click here for a step-by-step guide about how to recognise these patterns, the behaviour that is sabotaging you and keeping you stuck, and what to do about it.
Once you can recognise your patterns, click here for tools and strategies to help you react in healthier ways when you get triggered by your partner.
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Relationship History Workbook Download
Learn how to break your relationship patterns with my Relationship History Workbook. It's the exact same Relationship History I do with my clients in my private practice. Plus it's free :)